The rights to the Bloodborne IP have been sold to a Saudi Arabian-backed startup called Prima Aprilis, a new company comprised of various bigwig video game executives, and it has wasted no time shadow-dropping the long-awaited remake of the beloved Soulslike game. Bloodborne released to widespread critical acclaim back in 2015 and is generally considered one of the best PS4 exclusives and one of the best games FromSoftware has ever made. While it’s playable on PS5 through backward compatibility, Bloodborne has never gotten a native release on any system other than the PS4, despite fan demand for a remake, remaster, sequel, or even just a PC port.
The execs at Prima Aprilis worship follow the orders of a highly advanced AI, which advised them to acquire the Bloodborne IP and move forward with a remake. Following the AI’s instructions, Prima Aprilis has confirmed that not only is the Bloodborne remake available now, but it’s live on iOS and Android devices as a live-service game.
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Bloodborne Remake is a Live-Service Game
“We know that everyone has an infinite amount of time, so it makes a lot of sense to make a game that lives and dies by that,” one executive said. “Traditional pricing models where you make a game, sell it, and hope to profit just don’t make sense. Instead, we are making a game, not selling it, and hoping we can get people to play our game like it’s a full-time job that they have to check in on every day. We know that there is a lot of demand for microtransaction-fueled live-service games, and we are hoping to deliver that to Bloodborne fans.” While the developers working at Prima Aprilis are not allowed to speak to the press, one developer, Clyde Ferguson, who asked to remain anonymous, told GameRant, “We absolutely did not want to make this game.”
There are no professional reviews for the Bloodborne remake just yet, but there have been a few user reviews left on the game’s App Store page. “This is literally Mario Kart Tour,” one positive review said. Another review stated, “The other guy wasn’t lying, this is literally Mario Kart Tour, copy+pasted, but with Blood Echoes microtransactions.”
Even though the live-service Bloodborne game was live when I started writing this article, I have learned that it has since shut down. The executives that greenlit the project will be rewarding themselves with $50 million bonuses, as instructed by their AI overlord. “We really feel we deserve this.” No refunds will be issued to anyone that bought the premium Blood Echoes currency.
Released
March 24, 2015
ESRB
M for Mature: Blood and Gore, Violence
